Debbi K. Swanson
What’s in a name?
Respect? Dignity? Personality?
I’ve been curious about this because though formally named Deborah Kay, I’ve always been Debbi. Only when I was in trouble did I get called Deborah Kay - usually by my father who was seething mad at one of my latest “stunts,” as he called them. Throughout my career people told me I should use Deborah as a professional name, it sounded more adult. I resisted. Finally, this past year, when I returned to freelancing, I started using what I call my “adult” name.
Well, after some research. I discovered the real term for my “informal” name: diminutive. Well no wonder people think formal names are better - who wants to be thought of as diminutive? I called the songwriter Paul Williams that once in an interview and he was none too happy. Nor is he none too tall, I reiterate.
Websters defines diminutive as follows:
[1]diˇminˇuˇtive
Pronunciation: d&-’mi-ny&-tiv
Function: noun
Date: 14th century
1 : a diminutive word, affix, or name
2 : a diminutive individual
[2]diminutive
Function: adjective
1 : indicating small size and sometimes the state or quality of being familiarly known, lovable, pitiable, or contemptible; used of affixes (as -ette, -kin, -ling) and of words formed with them (as kitchenette, manikin, duckling), of clipped forms (as Jim), and of altered forms (as Peggy)
2 : exceptionally or notably small
I admit, I’m nowhere near diminutive but I just don’t feel like a Deborah. At the risk of offending my fellow Deborahs, that name has always evoked someone dull, humorless and unfriendly. No one I know would describe me that way - most of the time anyway.
People do respect formal names more than diminutive ones. I’m sure I’d have been trivialized by many, especially men, if my diminutive name was Muffy or Buffy or Tinkerbell. Yet KPCC radio’s Kitty Felde seems to get away with her feline moniker just fine. Is there a level of seriousness you have to have that’s higher than others when you have a name like Kitty?
Maybe our formal names are just a mask to hide our real selves? Our fun, easy going, relaxed, yet still bright and articulate selves, so we’re more accepted in professional circles and “command respect?” It works. Pete Jennings just wouldn’t have been the same as Peter. Yet Pete Williams is just fine. So perhaps it’s also a matching of name to personality. Like Jack the Ripper. John the Ripper wouldn’t have been the same. But John F. Kennedy, seemed to strike the perfect balance. John or JFK for the world, Jack to his friends and family. And a few other names for his enemies, to be sure.
It turns out there’s a certain geographical bent to whether we choose to use a formal or diminutive name. Edward Callary studied the geographical usage, determining that formal names are the rule in the Northeast, informal names the rule in the South and West. I’m sure wealth has a lot to do with this practice, too. I just can’t picture Billy Hearst. Always exceptions to be sure, but money and power seem to go with formal names.
So now what? Use Deborah even though I don’t feel like a Deborah? Or risk less respect and talk of being small, petty and diminutive with Debbi? I even took the e off Debbie, making it even more diminutive. Truthfully, it hasn’t seemed to cause me any harm. I guess the sane thing to do is leave everything formal in print, and go by Debbi in person. Then I’ll know if someone calls up and asks for Deborah, I know that I don’t know them and they don’t know me, giving me a leg up on cold calling salespeople. How unfriendly of me.
Inventive Idea
I read about UCI orthopedics professor Vincent Caiozzo, the lead researcher on the Space Cycle project. He’s figured out a way to create artificial gravity on a two-person exercise bike. Hell, I’ve figured that out just by putting on 20 pounds.
50+ Benefits?
So now that I’ve been AARP’d, and received my membership packet, I’m wondering what the big benefits are. Doesn’t seem like there’s much there except some possible insurance deals. What’s your experience with AARP membership benefits? I’d like to know. Email me at writerdeb@aol.com.
Keeping Current
Not a RIPP-off: The Costa Mesa City Council is offering incentives to encourage residents to reinvest in their homes. The Residential Remodeling Incentive Program or RIPP, is being offered from September through the end of the year. By meeting certain requirements, homeowners will receive a full waiver of the city’s normal Building Safety Division plan check and construction permit fees. Detailed information is available under the topic "Fall 2005 Residential Remodeling Incentive Program" on the city’s Website at www.ci.costa-mesa.ca.us, in person at the Building Division counter in the Development Services Department, 2nd floor of City Hall, 77 Fair Drive, Costa Mesa, or by calling the Building Safety Division at (714) 754-5273. Go forth and improve!
South Coast Repertory Theatre’s season is out. Start making reservations for The Caucasian Chalk Circle - September 10; American Premiere of Dumb Show by Joe Penhall, directed by David Emmes - October 1; Born Yesterday by Garson Kanin, directed by Warner Shook - October 22; A Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens, adapted by Jerry Patch, directed by John-David Keller - Previews begin on November 26; La Posada Mágica written and directed by Octavio Solis, music by Marcos Loya - Previews begin on December 9;
And up next year is the World Premiere of The Further Adventures of Hedda Gabler by Jeff Whitty, directed by Bill Rauch - January 14, 2006; American Premiere of Hitchcock Blonde written and directed by Terry Johnson - February 11; West Coast Premiere of Man from Nebraska by Tracy Letts, directed by William Friedkin - March 18; World Premiere to be announced - April 8 at 8pm; World Premiere of Bossa Nova by Kirsten Greenidge - April 29; and The Real Thing by Tom Stoppard (the man who brought us “Shakespeare in Love, Empire of the Sun and more), directed by Martin Benson in May.
Who Said It?
“It’s all human powered, that’s the beauty of it.”
The quipper of last month’s Who Said It quote, “I invented my life by taking for granted that everything I did not like would have an opposite, which I would like,” was the fabulous Coco Chanel. Now there’s a name.